enamoured: the name of a favorite Facebook group: Disney Gave Me Unrealistic Expectations About Love. (disney gave me unrealistic expectations)
Way too freaking long time, way too freaking no post.

I'm working on a piece, trying to get back into the mindset of being a thirteen year old girl, and I'm looking at my own journals from that stage of my life and it's been rough. It's funny--I feel like I can remember being that age well, but having the words before me feels like sensory overload. I found an entry when I talk about a teacher having to take me into the hall because I started crying in class over some drama with either my best friend or this awful boy that I liked. That boy shows up a lot in this one notebook. Like, I wrote a song about him (I wanted to be a pop star at the time, so I wrote lots of lyrics), and one of the lines from it was "your halfway love is cutting my soul like a knife", and what in the world was that about?

Anyway, I just found this one part where I talk about how said boy would pretend to flirt with me and say, "Oh, you like that!" when I would be like, "Ugh, stop." And I wrote:
Oh God, I do like it and I just want to have him wrapped around my finger and just kiss him and mess around in his hair and pull him closer and just have the pleasure of knowing that I want him and need him to possibly go on and have the pure satisfaction of knowing that we’re together.

When I read that, I hear it in my head as a long, kind of breathless gush, and I love that it's written like that. There was something going on in my thirteen year old head that understood the urgency that that sentence had, and knew that I didn't have to put a comma in there even though it's kind of a run-on. I felt that my writing had to be conversational and in that conversational way, splicing the sentence wasn't necessary.

I still like writing dialogue like that. I love heightened emotion and trying to get that frenetic, crazy feeling down in a way that makes sense and can make a reader really get what you’re going for.

But Lord, thirteen year olds are a mess. Bless their crazy little hearts.
enamoured: the starry-eyed emoticon: *_* (got stars in my eyes)

Second: Here's a one minute teaser trailer for the Peanuts movie coming out next year. I've probably mentioned this in the past, but I've loved Peanuts for practically as long as I can remember. One of my most prized possessions is a toy Snoopy that I've had pretty much my whole life. I have multiple copies of the comic page from the last weekend strip of the comics was published. I was so not on board with the idea of a CG-animated movie, but so far, the animation looks really, really nice.

And, okay, I am kind of emotional about the fact that I get to see a Peanuts movie at a theater. Bon Voyage, Charlie Brown came out five years before I was born. When this comes out, it'll be the first feature length movie with those characters in thirty-five years.

Third: I am a finalist for Pitchapalooza!

The Book Doctors had their Fourth Annual NaNoWriMo Pitchapalooza, and I sent in the pitch for my novel from last year, This Mad Season. On Saturday, I found out that my pitch was one of the twenty-five finalists that can now be voted on. The winning pitch "will receive an introduction to an agent or publisher appropriate for his/her manuscript."

If I had a gif of Abed from Community screaming silently, I'd post that here.

If you're so inclined, check my pitch out over here, and vote for it here if you like it! I'd appreciate your support so much. I've been giddy about this since I found out, and would be thrilled if I won.
enamoured: a kitty with a frog hat on. (i has frog on hed)
One of the things that I promised myself that I'd do this year was to get back on track with my reading. I usually read at least forty books a year, but last year I only read twenty-three. It was a stressful time, and I just couldn't focus enough on anything. I would check out books from the library, finish one or two of them, and not get around to the rest.

But this year, I'm going to get back up to my usual reading schedule. I checked out two books that I'd been dying to read on December 29, and they're overdue, but tomorrow I'm renewing one so that I can finish it. And there are books on my Kindle that I got on sale last year and never got around to finishing, so I've got those, and there are about six hardcovers that I either bought or was given as gifts that I've had for ages, and need to read.

But at the same time, I desperately need to finish writing This Mad Season, which was my NaNo novel from last year (I won again, holla!), so that I can edit it and then send it to CreateSpace for my free bound copy. And I still want to rewrite the one from the year before that, but I need to completely rework some of the earlier parts and do a lot more research before I do.

And that's all I got for right now! How are you?
enamoured: I approve this message. (i approve this message)
What is up with me:

1. Finished my French homework. Verbs and tenses are ridiculous. I'm just having a hard time with them. I think I'm pretty much going to dedicate at least a half hour a day through next week to reviewing passe compose and everything else so that I don't bomb my test. Also, I missed a few assignments from the last chapter, and I'm hoping that if I pull up my test grades and finish the rest of the homework, I'll do okay for the rest of the semester.


3. NaNo is coming along slowly! I'm almost 3000 words behind, but I figure I can make it up tomorrow and Thursday. Hopefully I can switch shifts with someone so that I can pop in to the Night of Writing Dangerously for a little bit. That's always fun to go to. Also, I can't wait to incorporate self-written cheesy boy band songs. [dances]

4. I also want to write ALL THE FAN FICTION all of a sudden, too. I still have that Avengers boy band AU that I need to really get into, plus sequels to various things I wrote, plus a continuation of a 5+1 thing I started this summer and got really, really stuck on. I know how I want it to end, but I'm in the noveling phase right now, so it will have to wait 'til I reach 50K.

5. I know exactly what I'm getting my mom for Christmas already. Usually I have the hardest time picking out things for her, but everything's planned out so far. I just need to buy it. I'm going to get her the first season of Dallas (original recipe Dallas) on DVD, and also a piggy bank for a vacation fund with $25 in it.

Everyone else? I have NO IDEA.

6. I'm going to make my Christmas card post tomorrow. Stay tuned.

7. I spent the better part of this morning watching The Lizzie Bennet Diaries on YouTube. I watched the first ten episodes during the summer and lost track, but everyone else has been buzzing about it lately, so I figured I'd catch up. It's fun!
enamoured: the Salvatore brothers: hotter than you since 1864. (we could write a bad bromance)

Thanks to Daylight Savings Time, I put in another hour's worth of work on my NaNo and managed to get up to 9K last night. And because my French instructor's late with posting our homework (again) and I don't absolutely need to be at school at 8 AM, I'm going to try to get to 11K tonight. Try being the key word. I'm actually really surprised/happy that I've gotten this far. I tried writing this particular novel during Camp NaNo this summer and didn't get very far. I've jumped into the action a bit more and changed the opening some, so I'm getting more and more eager to get to the next stage.

And because the novel deals with '90s related things, I am going down a big fat nostalgia spiral, and it's making me want to go roller skating for some reason. I have so many memories of going skating and going to skate parties for birthdays, and my school renting out the rink for one night during Catholic Schools Week. Good times.

Further motivation to meet word count: I won't let myself watch tonight's Once Upon a Time or last week's Revolution until I get there. So I'm going to try to finish that, and in the meantime I will leave you with the following gif, and I'll suggest that you look up Yackety Sax on YouTube and play it in the background as you watch. It makes it funnier.

enamoured: "I can't go out, I'm sick! COUGH COUGH". Mean Girls. (boo you whore)
I both love and hate going to meetings of my library's writing group. I love it because I get lots of helpful tips from other people, and I hate it because sometimes, it makes me want to throw out every single thing I've written. And then I read people's very literary and verbose discussions about what is wrong/right with YA lit, and that's most of what I write, and it makes me very self-conscious and that just further makes me anxious about keeping on.

And then, just when I think I want to rewrite something that I shared with the group earlier tonight, I end up reediting a scene for the fifth time and I think I've finally got it right.

Only now I have to recontexualize the scene. Great. Just great.
enamoured: I approve this message. (i approve this message)
Oh my GOD, I am sore and roasting to death. I have been helping my mom clean all week, and today I have been forced into cleaning/rearranging my room. I feel like hell. I am going to be sore tomorrow, I just know it.

On the other hand: after YEARS of wondering where the hell my box of diskettes (the diskettes that held all my old stories, fan fic and other) disappeared to, I found it in a box with a bunch of my dad's stuff in the garage! I don't have an external floppy drive so that I can unload all of it, and some of the older stuff was written in Microsoft Works, so I'll have to convert it somehow, but I am SO HAPPY that I found that! Mostly because one of the diskettes had my first ever NaNo novel on it, and I was sad at not having that saved anywhere else.

And then as I started moving crap around in my room, I found an old notebook that was a gift from a friend. The notebook, which was a birthday gift circa 1999, has the Backstreet Boys on the cover, and written inside is the biggest wish-fulfillment self insert fic I have ever written, and that's not counting the beach house story. The very idea of that book even existing makes me cry on the inside.

Once I'm done cleaning, I'm off to Half Price to drop off a box of books. I am too lazy to root through my mountains of magazines to determine which issues of Entertainment Weekly I want to toss or sell.
enamoured: The Little Mermaid. "But who cares? No big deal. I want... more." (part of your world)
This was a weird, long day. I got called for jury duty, and once I got home after that, I took Pepper for a walk, and on the way home my right hand started swelling. It was kind of awful. All of my fingers were stiff and puffy, and it's only been within the past two hours that I can move them without much pain.

On the Camp NaNo front: I will be 4000 words behind tomorrow, but I wrote a good chunk today in the waiting periods, and I embellished it once I got home. I think this is my favorite part so far:
Once the gravity of what Alton was asking him sank in, all that Will could think to say was, "Are you dying?"

He had been leaning forward in his seat, but at this question Alton quickly sat upright. "What?"

"Do you have cancer? A brain tumor?" Will could feel himself going slightly hysterical. He brought both hands up to his face and rubbed his nose. There was no way that this was happening. "Because there is just no logical, sane reason for you to even think of attempting to try to do that, and the only remotely sane explanation that I can think of is that you're dying and want one last hurrah, and if you are, then—"

"Jesus, Will, I'm not dying."
enamoured: I approve this message. (i approve this message)
I should rich text this to add bullet points, but I'm too lazy.

1. Is it possible to be happy about something but also kind of pissed off about it? If so, I'm absolutely feeling that right now and it's just weird. Also, the situation at hand is making me a little bit anxious and paranoid that I'm a terrible person and people secretly hate me. I'm acting like a twelve year old over it. God.

2. Anyway. I don't know if it's still a Thing or not, but I still love Texts From Last Night, especially when you get gems like this: "(617):How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?" I REALLY want to know the backstory for this. And while we're talking about "Call Me Maybe", here, have a video of the Harvard baseball team car dancing to it.


4. Here is a random video of Chris Evans macking on a girl in a parking garage. I don't know if it's the environment or what, but I find this absolutely hilarious. And I know that this profile is old (read: from last summer), but I will never get over it. I mean, this is the opening:
"chris evans pecs. how do they FEEL? like smooth stone from the souvenir shop?"

...is the instant message that pops up on my computer one Monday morning in April. My friend Kyle follows it up with a link to the gossip pages of the New York Daily News: I am being described as the "mystery maiden" Evans introduced to his mother at a premiere party; we held hands, the paper is reporting, "in a flirty manner," and he even placed "one of them on his chest." Oh.

When I started working on this profile, I decided on a "say yes to everything, try to be cool" approach, with the idea that maybe I'd capture something real about the star of Captain America: The First Avenger—or as "real" as could be hoped for/faked in the time we had together. But in the days since my first interview with Chris Evans, I'd drunk myself under the table, snuck out of his house at five thirty in the morning, bummed a ride home off a transsexual, been teased mercilessly in front of his mother, and now—this bit in the paper.

I don't remember touching his chest, which is too bad.

And it gets progressively weirder/funnier as you read on. When I realized that one of the editors from The Hairpin wrote it, it just made it better.

5. I am seriously considering looking in to how much it would cost to hire a maid for the day, because good Lord, my room is a mess and I am not angry enough to clean it. I have to be angry to clean my room. I do not know why.
enamoured: Topher Grace. I have had this icon since, uh, 2005? (lying down on the job)
If you watch enough TV and enjoy it in a non-passive way—in the kind of way that those of us who are in fandom and tend to get very into our shows do—you might have thought up the kind of show that you would one day like to watch, if only you had the connections and money to create this show.

I was thinking about this the other day, and about how high school shows sometimes tend to be about the jocks and cheerleaders and the artsy kids and the loners, and I was thinking about how my high school experience was definitely not like that, and I thought, "If I could, I would make a show about the kids on the yearbook staff secretly running everything."

Because think about it: what's in the yearbook is forever, more or less. The protagonist could be the editor, who wants to make sure that every club, sport, and organization gets equal coverage and wants to make the yearbook experience more interactive, and the antagonist could be the head photographer/photography editor, who has for years been taking bribes from random clubs so that they can get more pages than others and posts the worst pictures of people that they have grudges against.

Basically, it would be like the high school Mafia.

As much as I like this idea, I don't know if it would work because yearbooks aren’t as big of a deal any more.

On the writing front: I've made it a goal to finish the first draft of my Epic Teen Romance by June, but I'm stalled, stuck around chapter four. I really want to use part of it for my creative project in my YA Lit class, but I don't know which part! I'm also having a hard time thinking of which book I want to use for my critical analysis paper, and I have a few ideas of what I'd like to do with that, but I don't know if I could find the scholarly research necessary for it. I'd love to one day write something about book to TV show adaptations and how they add variations to the book world (see: Gossip Girl and how Chuck Bass went from being mostly in the background to being one of the major players on the show).

And instead of writing the novel, I wrote a poem the other day:
the universe says that every young love is bound by the same rules:
when in each other's arms, they believe they are inseparable,
that the grasp of time and space cannot contain them,
that they will beat the odds, break the chains, and obtain a kind of immortality.
they believe that this is completion, this person staring back at them
whispering secrets, sharing stolen moments and clandestine dreams.
of course, they could be wrong—far too often they are.
first love is rarely eternal, never perfect,
but then, is any love ever without flaw?
it could be that this is why we believe in the power of silent moments,
of a glance that sets your soul alight.
that love—this first love—is flawed and flawless,
hopeful and hopeless, the most beautiful contradiction imaginable.


enamoured: the starry-eyed emoticon: *_* (Default)
Candice (with an I)

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