it must have been that thing that lovers call fate.

I can't freaking WAIT until we get DSL, if, indeed, the paternal unit chooses to be agreeable. Oh please, please, please. I want.

I keep having recurring dreams about graduation. In all of them, I am not wearing my cap and gown, and I am usually last to arrive. In the one last night, I had to go run up a flight of stairs to borrow one, and I was upset that I didn't have my Quill and Scroll chord. There must be some kind of meaning behind this, but I am not picking it up. This is the only recurring dream that I am able to remember having.

I have been listening "With or Without You" by U2 repeatedly since I downloaded it last night. Gah. So gorgeous.

I went to Best Buy yesterday to apply for a job. Here's to hoping that I actually get it.

I'm secure in my insecurity, or so I tell myself.

I have come to accept the fact that there are just some things in life I will not understand. Doesn't mean that I can't not want to or that it won't bother me, I just won't get it.

I've been told I'm so mature for my age but I don't feel it. I don't feel as if I should be this age to begin with, you know? So to have someone tell me I'm more mature than most is weird to me. I'm used to hearing it--I've heard it since I was about ten, but still, it's odd.

I shouldn't compare myself to other people my age, because half of them are just without, and the other half are probably light-years above or beyond me. It's just... when you talk to certain people who've had more "experience", you start to feel very small and insignificant and not "much more mature" than you have been told that you are.

I have a weird complex like that. I hate when I do this to myself.

Less drearily: I. Must. See. Without a Paddle. The trailers are hilarious, especially at the end, when they play "Bump N Grind". And Seth Green always makes me laugh, so that is simply an added bonus.

Why, oh why do I watch Fear Factor?! I must be a masochist. The food challenges always make me want to go vegan. Oh. Ugh.

I think I'm going to make a milkshake. Or not. Gah.